Today when I was on my way to work, I thought about
how fortunate I am to say I have a job. I had my first job when I
was 14 years old, and had a lot independence at such a young age.
To most of my friends at the time, they couldn't believe that at that
age, I was making my own money and not depending on my
parents to pay for things. As I grew up, I realized that money
really isn't everything as much as people make it seem. I know that
when I was growing up, my parents made sure that all of their kids
were taken care of. Many families living out here have
to struggle because of situations that they have to face. Either its
because of drugs, unemployment, or the life styles they were
brought up in. My parents where the type of people who worked
hard for what they wanted. I understand that people
have problems in their life when it comes to supporting their family
but it takes dedication to have a future. It makes me upset when
your aware of living in a society with criminals who steal from each
other or even kill over money because they don't want to get a job
but hey I guess that's "life" huh? I don't think anyone will ever
know the truth behind people and their behavior being so greedy
for money but I do believe that it should be kept under control.
Think about your audience here. We are left in the dark. For example: what do you do now? What job did you have at 14? What do you want to be doing? We have no idea. Really consider topic development. Invest in an introduction to each post, detailed commentary on the sensory scale (sounds, visuals, etc.). Try to make your readers invest in your topic through making common connections...
ReplyDelete